The world inside a wave

  

My dreaming island

  

Great expectation

Spring,the royal feast of worlds' beauties,The queen of the year,the fine princess of the seasons,but how can I enjoy it while my dearest ones are sad?How can i when I see they're disappointed?Or how can I help them?The most suffering thing for me is my incapablity to help them.I wish I could bring them light and hope in life,brighten their days with happiness and freshness,I wish I could help them see spring.By the way this is my nature,good or bad I can't change and I wont.
Life,what a confusing word.If it is such valuable,why is it vested such widely?If it is so great,why seem so boring?If such amazing,why so gloomy?If so wonderful,why sorrowful?What life really is?How can we get to know it?How can we appreciate the sweet moments given to us?
Each day is adding more questions on my mind,without helping find an answer.The worst thing is the feeling I am loosing my words and not knowing what to do.What is the best way to live a life,without any hurt?Sometimes I wish I were left in a quiet island alone with trouble,anger,and evil memories removed from me.Great expectations,ye I know it is impossible,but this wish is so soothing and sweet for me just wish I could.

Tulips waiting for spring

  

Endless,Endless questions

Spring days,I can just describe them wonderful,but I know it is so humble conveying the beauty and freshness of the air,and the azure,cloudy,and immense sky.The sun shines softly,birds sing happily,trees dance by the whispering wind,and The music of the earth can be heard easily.Why people are so blind towards such beauties?I have always wondered why the most sweet and pure things,generously around us are so cruely ignored?There are so many dear forgotten things,how can we review them again?How can people live without them?What's on their mind?What's on their heart?
Endless,endless questions,isn't there really an answer to them?Centuries of philosophy,science and arts seem useless,when these things busy my mind,and I can't help feeling so sorry and lost,being unable to find an answer.Who is there to tell me why people are living in this way?

Paradise lost

  

The lyng truth

Today,the rainy spring day,the day of silence and the symphony of rain drops,the day of crying cloudes and azure sky.Still I feel sad,still I am bored,still I have the desire to set up,to an unknown road,where there would be no one.I don't know where is this dream land,or how it is,but this sweet temptation will not give me alone.I am fed up with these liar people,I am tired of there ill tempered behavior,I just want to leave,to any where,but now here,in this cruel world,with such people.There must be a new world created and new human.This is my belife,as I am loosing all my faith to human purity.It is not that much strange as I see how they betray,as I see their endless lies,as I see trataitors.What can I do,I can't stand it and I can't do some thing to change it.This endless challenge will never leaves it's shadow on me.Why people are like this?Purity is a forgotten story,vertue is only reachable on the myths,and truth is becoming a lie in this world.

The silence of a traditional house

  

The dome and the sky

  

Zoroasterian sign

  

the door of a traditional house

  

Jame mosque

  

Amir chakhmaque mosque

  

The allyes

  

the tails of the mosque

  

zoroasterian fire temple

  

The magical sunset in yazd

  

The tower wind

  

Back to my room again

I am back to my room again,I am back to Tehran as I've been out for a week,I've been in yazd.One of the most ancient cities in the world.The city which was born with myths,grown up with history,and became rich by the culture.It was fascinating,wonderful,and beautiful.I can't ever describe the sweet powerful magic which spelled me so softly that all my best memories would refer there,all my pride,my dignity,my love to my country and culture.How can I express such feeling,as the words are so unable to convey what is in my heart?
But,why now that I am back,so happy and delighted firs, feel so sad again?Why I feel all the familiar things which I knew are so strange to me?Why I feel this rainy sky is crying with all it's soul?I don't know,there is something very sad here,I can't find what it is,but anything it is,really makes me feel gloomy.The drops of the rain are faling softly on the silent houses,the trees green and happy singing as the rain washes their young and new leaves,the birds are fling,and spring is every where.
It is so contradicted,I feel both changed and unchanged,I can't get to know what I want and what I am looking for.As I still see people lie,as I see how world can be cruel to people,as I see I am despaired .Yes,I now I think that I have the courage to admit that I am disappointed of every one and every thing.There are many things on my mind,and many storms on heart,I feel so weary,weary to my bones,weary from this endless,useless days,I can't see any chance to change this world,this people,and even my own self.
I know there is still hope,but why is it so hard to belive in it?

Singing waterfall

  

Spring is here

Another year has passed and I'm entering my 21th spring.The blooms are dancing happily with cool spring breeze and wellcome the old world's another birth.
We,Iranian have very special symbolic traditions,which I really love.We put special things called 7"S".We put things which start with "S" in our own language and have a symbolic meaning,such as apple which means the purity and youth,mirror for the honesty,small golden fishes for movement and life,candle for brightness and luminosity,coins in order to wish prosperity,meadow for the freshness, and many other things.
The 7"S"is the heritage of my ancestors,these traditions are our identity and pride.I can't help admitting that I do admire Iranian traditions as they are full of meaning,full of the sprite of life and a great connection with the universe pulse and I'm so happy and proud of my identity and ancient meaningful traditions.

the nature

  

Spring gift

  

Tomorrow night

Tomorrow night,when the old world will renew and become young and fresh again.Tomorrow night,when spring will over come the old winter,when the cold,dead,and unfamiliar season will leave.The trees will start singing the most welcomed song of spring,and the birds will fly in the happy,smiling,and blue of sky.I know,believe,and dream them all,and just wish I could find my peace again,but now I've got some thing very nice and soothing,that God really loves me.I have really touched it,really felt and believed it.
I don't know what else I shall say.In spite of all these sadness and gloomies on my life,I am still alive,and still there are many chances left for me on the future before me.Tomorrow night is when...

Loosing words

I am so bored,so much.I hardly find words to write and use.It seems there is some thing on me,some thing,like a sticky shadow,which never leaves me alone.How this waste universe seems boring to me?Why?Every thing seems old and gloomy to meow hate to feel so,let me stop writ's,I don't feel good tonight.

Why life is so cruel to some people?

Shall I be selfish?Shall I ignore peoples' bad points and keep doing what I want?I don't know,maybe it is true that my mind is so unchangeable,but this is not what I want to be in life.What does life mean?How can we live?I can't stop thinking about all these things,I can't be as ignorant as other people are,I can't,I know,I am stubborn,God,why shall I be like that?Every one has it's own characteristics,but why are they so unchanged on me?
I am sad,I feel so sad when I hear defeats and sorrowful happenings in people's lives.I have always wanted the best for them,I have always prayed for them,but now...I can't express my sadness,no,now I know that I can't ignore people's troubles,I can never do it.I can't act agaist what is on my nature.Although I know that it is possible,but I would hate my self,if I do such thing.I'll have my own life,but it would not be far and regardless to others.I know I can't donate every one peace,but I'll do my best.God!I can't express my sorrow,I am really shocked and upset.How could it happen,while I had so much prayed?Why life must be so cruel,dark,and hard for some people?How can it plunder such joy and youthfulness?WHY?I wish I could do some thing,I wish I could help in some way,How can I?I can't live apart these people.Now I am sure about it.

The shadow of paradise

  

Still hesitated

Still I am thinking about my plan,and still I could not reach a firm decisio.I really can't stand the situation of not knowing what to do and what to think.The feeling is horrible,awesome,and annoying for me.The year is coming to it's end,I shall make my decision before the year ends,but how?I really need the change and if I do what is on my mind,I'm not sure if I could go on like that or not.I don't know whether I could tolerate my new way or not,hesitation,hesitation,hesitation.I don't know when I would be released of this suffering shadow,I'm so troubled by all these feelings and need to change,but I don't know how!!!Doesn't it seem ridiculous?I don't know,I feel gloomy and confused,and this makes me so sad,why shall I always struggle with such contradicted feelings?I'm getting so tired of this endless dilemma,I need peace,but how can I gain it?How can I find the joy of life?Sometimes I really wonder whether I am really alive or not.That old pleasing passion of life has left me,how can I bring it back?How sad I feel now.I shall change,I know,I believe,but how?All these questions,never leave me,they are becoming one part of me,but WHY?

Growth

  

Desire of an exploration

I am deciding and trying to find a way.I need to change my life,I need to do some thing new,go on my own way,and reconsider every thing,but still I don't know what to do!I have this strong desire,but I don't know how to start this journey.I know I might be stubborn,but this time I shall change,I don't know if it would be a mistake to set up without knowing the destination,but what can I do,when the road calls me and my feet are restless.I can't ignore the spell of visiting new lands,exploring real life,and start breathing again.How can I stand still,while this passion is so strong on me?I shall set up,I shall leave where I am and meet new things.I admit that it's a little scaring for me.Leaving where I've always been,feeling safe and secure and worries me a little,but I shall gather all my courage and keep in mind that a true explorer will never be scared of difficulties and upcoming dangers.I shall remember""Until you spread your wings, you'll have no idea how far you can fly."

Decesion to set up

I became to believe I shall start my own great adventure.I shall set up and find my own way in life.After so many years studing philosophiy,after comming across with contradicted ideas,so much efforts,gaining another vision to see things,I shall start my own journey.I shall contribute my own experience of life.Today,I was thinking maybe all these years was not a REALL life,but a shadow of it,this is making me feeling more urgent to .Now I feel I've been very selfish,I don't know why I think so as I always wanted people happiness even if it was worthing by my own sorrows.I don't know why all of these things must happen?Some times I feel I shall leave people to protect them against myself.Sometimes I can't help feeling that if I can't help this people I shall punish myself.I don't know why I think so,or why it is so strong on me?I shall st up,I shall take my siutcase in my hand,I shall wear my shoes,and strat the road,unknown,lost in the mist,but I shall not give up.World,the great and mysteroius,is a strange place to lie.there are many things one shall consider,there are many feelings one shall tasete.God,help me,I really don't know what to do,I am confused.I need a sign,otherwise I would be lost.

The puity of a flower

  

Spring coming

March is bringing glad tidings of spring arrival.The immense sky,sometimes smiles brightly with the sun,and some times chokes with the azul clouds.The spring,cool beeze,the trees raising their hands towarsd the sky,in order to hug it with all their soul are the most fascinating vision one could ever imagine.I can see how they show their new,geen,and innocents blooms.I can see the birds readying them selves to sing in the gardens.Soon the shadow of heavens will be on the earth again,and the old,sleeping world will be renewed and young and the music of the earth would be heard by every one.Spring has a magic in its self,I don't know what are those magical words,which removes the dead winter,and reviews the life.Just if we could know that,we would let spring spell us and refresh us again.

The way most people are

Days:this word is making me some how mad.I'm getting to hate this word,I don't know why."Hate",this is not a nice word for me,and I really don't like and avoid,but this time,I really feel satisfied using it,because this is what I truly feel about it.I don't care now whether it is rude,or not,I feel gloomy again,and again it's because of people and their behavior.I really feel so sad and gloomy when I see they betray each other,when they lie,and what is this lie for?Have they ever think if it worth's or not?I can't get them,really.It seems that their whole life is a great lie,becoming grown up day after day.Or they put their life based on it,but why do they such thing?Don't they ever feel this may not be the true way in their lives?Don't they ever came to the desire of changing it?I feel they are so tolerant that they can still stand this life,but perhaps it shall not be called tolerance,maybe they are happy to be like that;liars,traitors,criminals...

An angel's peaceful moment

  

Silence

I am getting so tired of my every day life really need to change it,there must bea change don't know what to do,but I just hope that my future journey in our Fridays(Now roz)would help me regain the balance in my life again hardly find words going on writing words are scaping.The pain of knowledge is incurable.
Why people are fighting?Do they know the reason of all their efforst?I wish they could answer it,but if they would be asked such questions,what would be their answer?Who know?Maybe they,themselves don't know that.Again this silence in me has begun.

My chosen way

Another day has just come to its end and this train of the days will never stop.I don't know what shall I say,because again I have lost my words.Still I'm studing philosophy by myself,and I know that it's so dangerous to do it alone.I know that without a good teacher to guide,I might be lost the wayI'm going on,and just hope that nothing wrong would happen to me.I'm getting dangerously honest,and in this society and time,it's not wise that much.By the way I am not going to lie,or hide things from the others, right or wrong,I will keep being like that.
I know what people might think about me I am ling,or mad!This is the common thinking people have,and I'm getting to come across with them.I am getting new experiences through this passage,and I 'm happy that all these series of events helped me to find such feeling and make my decision.Now I feel I am enough hothead and stubborn to follow this pattern the way it's my way,I know I might be sad to see more bad things,I might hear more lies,but I shall do what I've chosed.

Quiet sunset

  

Chalenging for an answer

Days are just like the same,the same sun,the same moon,the same sky...God,it was not how I used to feel.Something has changed,something has very changed,and I can't find what it is.I feel sad and happy,I feel gloomy and delighted.I can't understand how this many versions of contradicted feelings may happen in me.I am so confused,but I can say I have a peace instead of war,and that's very soothing.
Now I am fighting with my irritable.Why shall I have such confused feelings?Or why people are so two faced?Why every one is used to tell lies?Why this world is full of unjustness?Why the sun shines the same at the good and the bad?These questions are restless on my mind.Even the most sweet people are not as they seem,even the most honest ones may tell lies,even the most beautiful dreams may turn ugly.Heavens what's wrong with this world?Why shall all these happen?
Who is honest and brave enough to answer my questions?Even not to me,but to it's own true self?

the down

  

peace and joy